Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize