She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
