She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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