well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize