i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
