yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize