its not stalking. its research.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
