Screwed.edu
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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