Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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