I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
