the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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