i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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