You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize