How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
