I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
