is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
