haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
