butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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