Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
