Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
