My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
