Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm just crazy horny about you
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
