if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize