it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
