Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He better not be in your backpack
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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