It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize