ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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