im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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