Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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