Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
