I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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