im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I just found a bag of teeth...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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