1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize