benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
