farters have to be the big spoon...
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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