i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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