Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
This is classic penis vs brain.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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