dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
