somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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