Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Randomize
