we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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