they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
