I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize