Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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