If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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