so let's talk penis.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
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