thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
