Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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