Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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