Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
