He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I am puke
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
